Today was my first official class of Beginning Yoga.
… I am in a class full of⎯for a lack of a better word⎯pussies.
Last week, our teacher told us to fill up the front so that people who come in late can join in the back with less distraction.
So I did just that. But there was one girl who came in before me and decided to sit in the farthest back corner anyway, setting up a second yoga mat for a friend who probably came later. I didn’t look back to see if her friend ever came, and frankly, I didn’t give a shit.
A few minutes later, a girl comes walking sheepishly to the front and decides ultimately to sit directly behind me with barely space between our mats. Then, like fate’s terrible excuse of a joke, people start lining up behind her one by one, creating a row of people.
Keep in mind, that during this formation of a preschool-like line behind my fashion, there has yet been anybody else with enough balls to sit in the front.
Bunch. Of. Pussies.
Now, I’m not exactly the bravest person in the world, but I can’t believe that out of the fifty-plus people in that class, not ONE of them could muster enough testicle to sit in the front.
Of course, the flock of sheep culminating in the back was eventually herded to the front by our teacher. And still to this moment, I type in disbelief of the disappointment of what has come of our humanity.
